Self- deprecation

I've been dealing with PTSD, I'm not 100%, I'm not even 10%, I'm still loading. By that I mean that I'm not all there. Its 2:30 a.m.

I'm lying here in bed, thinking about life/spam texting my sister, and I have to tell you, I'm very disappointed in myself. When I was a kid I aspired to become Michelangelo  from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I've failed myself. I took a good, long, hard look in the mirror (metaphorically speaking, I cant stand looking at my face for that long) and I noticed that I'm nowhere near Teenage Ninja Turtle Material.

Mutant, yes. Ninja. no.

I've let my six year old self down. 

I also acknowledge that I never moved in with my best friend from first grade (as planned in first grade), to a house on the beach with lots of windows, where no boys are allowed. I'm a disgrace to my Youthful expectations!! If you need me I'll just be in the back of my closet sitting on my shoes and crying. Sorry for crushing your dreams little me, I'm also sorry about that haircut, you should have thought that one through a little more. It'll grow, you must endure. 

I have another bad haircut now actually, its literally as if everything and nothing has changed!! I woke up yesterday and said to myself "Hey! I think I'll make my hair wavy and poofy and dry looking" which was a bad idea because I ended up looking like Ginger from "As told by Ginger"

I leave you with this. 

-Liz

Life hates me.

Its sad, when you spend every waking moment talking with someone and then realize you don't really know who they are. Then they tell YOU they cant take anymore of the relationship. There's a hole inside me now, that no amount of Food City Deli cupcakes can fill. Do you feel sorry for me yet? I'm going to go buy a bunch of music from Amazon. Maybe that will fill the void, I highly doubt it. I don't know what to do to make myself feel better.

-Liz

Tegan and Sara - I Was A Fool

Little did I know.

   In case you didn't know, I graduated high school about two years ago, and have been looking for the right college. I've been searching for a while now, (I still haven't decided, if you think that's what this is about) but I've been searching schools. I've looked everywhere. Honestly. I've went from the local community college to online colleges, to ITT tech ( oh yes, Its went that far) and still, nothing. While I've been trying to finish a course from EDX.ORG which is an awesome site that lets you try out college courses from places such as HARVARD, I decided to look up different art schools, who knows maybe I'd actually get into one. I know I'd love to get involved with art and learn more about it, but I'm not quite sure about myself.
     Anyway, while I was looking through the top art schools in the United States, I came across one by the name of:

"Rhode Island School of Design"

    Number 2, on the list, right underneath Yale, typical me, I Google that stuff. Was I surprised when I saw the images that came up from the search. Go ahead search it yourself. 

    I'm glad I came across this school, I might look into this one. And if I don't, at least they succeeded in making me laugh. Thank you RISD. You're one of a kind.

    Liz

NEW YEARS DAY - Angel Eyes (featuring Chris Motionless of Motionless In ...

Thanks To You

Thanks To You- All Time Low
its what I'm hearing,

How am I? oh well, I guess everything is going okay.Stuff has been happening and I've found it harder to keep up with blogging like I once did. Life is perplexing anymore. I'm confused about things that I used to be so sure about. Anyone else have those issues, I know there is someone out there reading this, maybe you're on the shy side and afraid to comment, I assure you that I am no snob, I'd love to hear what you have to say, and look at it this way there's a chance that you could help me. Maybe I need professional help?
 

On another note "Vitamin C Cream enriched with Argan Oil" smells amazing.

Shadow Moses

Shadow Moses- Bring Me The Horizon